In The Lap Of The Gods
Dear Doug,
You seem like a friendly guy and I want you to know I consider you a friend. Not my best friend, like Eddy who was there with me the night Tina’s budgie got electrocuted and helped me hide the evidence, but still a friend all the same.
So I was wondering if you’re familiar with the song by Queen, “In the Lap of the Gods”? I think it has some very powerful philosophical truth that could really help you in your quest to lead this province with fairness and wisdom. The chorus of the song goes “La, La, Lalala-oooo, wah, la, wah-ooo, I’m no fool, it’s in the lap of the Gods”. Come to think of it, maybe most of the philosophical truth is actually in the verse. But it’s a great chorus when you hear it with Freddy singing and the guitars and everything. Anyway, good luck friend.
And please try to be less of an ignorant douche.
Sincerely
Tim